Monday 23 April 2012

Decisions

As my kids get older and older I am finding that the decisions are getting more and more difficult.  At first it was fairly easy.  Pampers or Huggies?  Should I buy the three month onesie or the six month onesie?  Should i start baby cereal at 4. month or 6 months?  


Now though, the decisions are getting hhharder.  Public school or christian school?  Can they go into friends houses that I barely know the parents?  Yes, as they get older the decisions that we are making are starting to make an impact on their future and its a little scary.  

From a young age, Alyssa has always been pretty apprehensive, and sometimes downright scared around men. I'm not sure where the fear began but she has been known to run out of her friends backyard because their dad came home.  As she has gotten older the fear is still there but she has more control over her actions.  So she won't necessarily run away from a man but she will definately not make conversation around men that she is unsure of.  

When Alyssa was 3 1/2 she was enrolled in WEE College (a program through our church) and the children's pastor was running it.  He was a he and Alyssa had a big problem with a boy teacher.  She would cry and complain that she didn't want to go and because I was afraid of her starting to not like church, I pulled her out of it.  I'm still to this day not sure that that was the right decision to make.
 
Now she is in swimming lessons (and has been for some time) and she has a boy teacher.  The first week she seemed okay with it but this last week she came crying to me and didn't want to continue her swimming lessons.  This has never happened before. She has been in swimming lessons since she was three and has always loved them. She has no fear of the water.  So, she is saying that she doesn't want to continue swimming lessons because she doesn't like her boy teacher.  What should I do?  Do I pull her out?  I'm thinking that that is not the right choice here because as she gets older she is going to have men teachers etc.

But, to tell you the truth I am wondering if there is something more going on.  The last class Alyssa was in was Sunfish and I have heard from many people that it is a hard class to pass.  You have to be able to swim unassisted for so many metres.  Alyssa can't do this, yet she was passed on to the next level.  So this level, Crockodile is really hard for her and she seems to be struggling and not likeing that most of the kids are better than her.  So  I am kind of thinking that the reasone she doesn't want to do the class is taht its too hard for her.  

Is the problem that Alyssa doesn't want a boy teacher or is it that the class is too hard for her?  I really don't know what the answer is and I am waiting for a call back from the instructor.  I don't want to push her through it and make her dislike swimming but I also don't want to let her off easy.  Hmmmmmmm........I just don't know.

My first reaction was to pull her from the class but, Ihave to admit that I have a history of when something gets tough I have been known to quit. And Ihate that quality about myself and definately don't want to pass it on to Alyssa.  But when I see her crying and trying to hide it from the instructor my heart just shatters and I just want to protect my baby from whatever  is bugging her.

So, as you can see the decisions definately get harder as they get older.   Matt is also unsure of what we should do.  Anyway hopefully the instructor has some helpful suggestions and we will get this figured out with Alyssa still loving swimming and getting used to having men teachers in her life. 

On to other news, Matt just left for Houston. He has started eight weeks where he will be here for a week and then in Houston for a week. It's going to be tough having him gone and then back again, only to leave again.  But we are hoping that it will be easieron the kds than having him gone for three weeks at a time.  Hopefully all this travel will be just in the short term and will be worth it in teh end.  

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